'Silence does not equal consent'

ed note–keep in mind as you read this that the esteemed Rabbi writing this piece is a woman.

Next–please note (and especially all you ‘Judeo–Christians’–yes, by definition that’s what you are–who run to the defense of the Judaic Torah as a ‘holy book’ everytime it is mentioned here in the disparaging yet honest light that it deserves) that our esteemed female Rabbi does indeed conclude that the story of Abraham and Sarah as related within the book of Genesis is indeed one in which Abraham has prostituted Sarah to Pharaoh, knowing all the while what a position such as this entails, in order that he be ‘well treated’ in exactly the same manner as takes place today with any pimp. Abraham–indeed as related by our esteemed female Rabbi–was rewarded by Pharaoh with ‘sheep, oxen, asses, male and female slaves, and camels’. Note how our esteemed female Rabbi then goes on to describe Abraham’s son Isaac engaging in the very same behavior with his own wife, Rebecca, i.e. attempting to sell her into prostitution through the mechanism of coercing her into lying to the men of Gerar that she is Isaac’s ‘sister’ rather than his wife, intimating that she is thus unmarried and available for whoever has his sights set on her.

And finally, please note what our esteemed Hebraic author has to say in the last paragraph of this very revealing piece concerning the ‘serial sexual predation that is as old as the Bible itself’. Here she is admitting that men exploiting women is indeed a Judaic value which has been celebrated for thousands of years both within the Judaic and ‘Christian’ religions. 

What is most amazing about all of this however is the following–

There is nothing new about the stories involving Abraham and Isaac selling their womenfolk off as flesh to be used for other mens’ pleasure. How is it that 4,000 years later, NO ONE has bothered to examine this very problematic aspect of Judaism, and particularly today in this ‘enlightened’ 21st century AD? Can we just imagine the kind of noise there would be if Islam contained similar stories concerning Mohammed (PBUH) and his progeny selling their womenfolk off as prostitutes, utilizing the same parameters that exist within Judaism as related in the Torah?

But the most amazing thing about all of this is that our esteemed Rabbi continues to adhere to her Judaism, despite the glaring problems that exist within it vis a vis the sexploitation of women and the celebration of those who engage in it. Were she a true feminist and concerned with the dignity due her and those making up her sisterhood, she/they would abandon Judaism whole hog and recognize it for the testimony to misogyny that it was, is, and by nature always will be.

Instead, in true schizophrenic fashion which unfortunately plagues this particular neighborhood of people within the community of man, our esteemed female rabbi will undoubtedly not only continue to adhere to her Judaism but also will lend her support for all those causes which are the highest testimony to woman-hatred as any could exist–abortion on demand, lesbianism and making sure the most dangerous-to-womens’-well-being plague that has ever come along–pornography–all remain not just legal, but sanctified and idolized within the ‘Judeo-Christian’ West where organized Jewish interests dominate all aspects of public (and sadly, private) life.

Rabbi Yael B. Ridberg  for the Times of Israel

In the past few weeks as the stories of sexual harassment and abuse at the hands of Harvey Weinstein have come to light, the prevalence of sexual exploitation and harassment in our society has entered the national spotlight. #MeToo stories are real, and they are being told by women in nearly every field and walk of life. The presumption on the part of men that their position, their stature, and self importance is such that they are entitled to take what they want from women is clear. The power of #MeToo, though, is that it has taken something that women have long kept quiet about and virtually shattered the silence of isolation.

The silence is not new, and we have only to look at this week’s Torah portion of Lech Lecha to see how silence is perceived as consent, thereby setting up the ancient system of women as notions of property, to be dealt with as any man likes. As Abraham and Sarah head to Egypt, Abraham is concerned about his safety (not theirs), and proposes to Sarah that because she is beautiful, she indicate that she is Abraham’s sister “that it may go well with me for your sake, and that I may live on account of you” (Gen. 12:13).

The Egyptians cannot help but notice Sarah’s beauty, and she is taken to Pharaoh, who takes her into his harem. The great Torah commentator Rashi explains that Abraham was hoping that the Egyptians would not only spare his life, but that they would shower him with gifts. Which by the way, they do: with sheep, oxen, asses, male and female slaves, and camels, all this while Pharaoh was assaulting Sarah in silence. It isn’t too far fetched to read these riches as a payment for Sarah’s “services,” even while traditional commentators see her behavior as an act of courage.

We don’t know what happened in Pharaoh’s bedchamber, not the least of which is because the narrative does not record Sarah’s thoughts, words, or actions during or after her encounter with Pharaoh. Readers of the text might dismiss her silence since the Torah is replete with moments where dialogue is missing, and we have to read between the lines to interpret the text. But I have always identified her silence with discomfort, insecurity, and fear that something worse could happen if she didn’t comply. Was she taken against her will? Did she say no to Pharaoh?

Remarkably, this motif will repeat itself two more times in Genesis, once again with Sarah, in Genesis 20, and in a nod to the teaching of the rabbis, “ma’aseh avot siman l’vanim” — the actions of the fathers are signs for the sons — between Isaac and Rebecca, Genesis 26. Each of these scenes occurs directly after God has made some pledge of prosperity to the patriarch, which only serves to underscore the power dynamics between men and their wives in the Torah, and the larger point that sexual assault isn’t ever really about sex, it’s about power. The ease of the presumption and perpetuation of behavior, in the face of Sarah’s (and Rebecca’s) silence, which masquerades as consent.

Consent refers to a practice of seeking a person’s permission before proceeding with a particular behavior or course of action. We might all agree that a person has the right to choose what she or he experiences or doesn’t, but in the context of sexual harassment and assault, as we have heard over and over again in the now more than 65 accounts against Weinstein, women often find themselves stunned into silence by the behavior of a man they know, admire, report to, work for, or respect. There is an uncomfortable tension here because many men don’t seem to take the need for consent seriously, and women who are victimized by this behavior often question whether they had a right to say no.

There is much work to be done in confronting a climate of serial sexual predation that is as old as the Bible itself. It is important for women to be able to raise our voices out of the silence, but we also need men to stop belittling, undermining, harassing, assaulting, and abusing women, and they must condemn such behavior when they see it. Let us break the cycle of such behavior so that indeed, each of us might be the blessing that the covenantal promise of the portion anticipates.